Day 14

Today is much better than the last few. Chloe has been playing and acting normal all day minus the fact she still has not pooped. I am so over trying!! I upped her magnesium dose per doctors orders and now we are waiting….tick tock tick tock… 

Today, I looked at my disaster of a house and am back to handling laundry, the monumental amount of dishes, and the daily grind of owning a business while juggling two kids. Connor has been amazing throughout all of this. Props to that boy!!! His needs have been pushed aside over and over again and he has taken it with grace. I feel so bad for both of my kids now. Connor is getting pushed aside when he’s done nothing wrong and Chloe is in pain because she can’t poop. And me? Well, I can’t win at life. Whoever has my voodoo doll and is stabbing the shit out of it, please stop. I am at the end of my rope. Thanks. 

Today I snapped at Darren for buying veggies that weren’t organic and the wrong beef (which isn’t organic, grass fed, no hormones added, etc.) He just bought lean beef. I snapped, made him go back to Sprouts and now I’m sitting here feeling like a psycho bitch who takes things too far. 

I feel like my pendulum has swung too far in the other direction. I have no balance with this right now. I am trying to be the best Celiac Mom ever, but I am sucking as a normal wife and mom. Dammit.

We are having trademark issues with the business(again), our washing machine is on its last leg, medical bills out the wazoo, trailer just broke, health issues with Chloe, major family issues and so, so much more. 

My bestie came over to comfort me the day I got home from the ER, brought me some whiskey and some amazingly motivational bracelets. She knows just what I need. Today I found this note in the bag and it was exactly what I needed to hear today. 

I sat down today to watch a tv show for the first time IN 3 WEEKS only to be interrupted by 4 jobs to book and a mountain of laundry to fold. Damn. One day I will have a normal life again. I hope. One day I will look back at this blog and realize how far we’ve come from the challenges of 2017, but as for today? I am just tying a knot in my rope and hanging on! 

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